The Flame of Fame

Fame or stardom is a very hot flame that instantly melts every wax of privacy and personal freedom around us, rendering us completely bare. 

Unless we are prepared to share all that we have with anyone and everyone who cares to know each of our steps and moves, then we must think twice before entering into this furnace, if we have got the choice to do so.

But who knows? it may not be our desire, yet we could find ourselves thrown into the hot flames, perhaps by a sudden twist and turn in life, which we never contemplated. It then behooves on us to understand that it can never be the same again; can never be business as usual.

The earlier we knew the cost of fame, the better prepared we would be, should we  find ourselves there.... The better we would understand and even sympathize with those stars we love, admire and even idolise.


The flame of fame, makes us shine....and burns the very cloak with which we have covered ourselves for so long...

The One and the Many

Among the many amazing observations on human relations that have come to me, two things stand out.

First, that each human being is unique. No two persons are exactly the same in all respects. People are different. One man's meat is another man's poison...one man's trash is another man's treasure.

Second, human beings have a lot in common. We live in one planet. We depend on one central sun. We share many things with those who eat what we call food as well as with those who eat what we call poison. We go to the same markets and use same currencies with those we barely know. The Naira or dollar note in your hand now must have been handled by several persons, including those you despise.

The One and the Many. To connect these two qualities, I found a word: RESPECT

Just let people be. Treat the other human being with respect just as you respect yourself. Dont try to judge others harshly, for you may not really know them. Do not go on and on analysing a person's tendencies and capabilities on a self imposed fault- finding mission! The earth is indeed a glass-house. Let us not throw stones.

On the other hand, let us realise that we cannot really be isolated. We must get out of our protective shells once in a while and reach out to others, especially to those with whom we share common values and interpretations on at least one aspect of life. During our interactions, let us as much as possible dwell on these things that bind us together. Thus united, we would find it easier to harmonise our differences.

I am one person-unique individual. There is no other person exactly like me.

I am a garden with many flowers. The key with which you enter the garden is respect. Come in and breathe in the sweet fragrance of the beautiful flowers you find attractive to you---and overlook those you are not attracted to.

Behold, my one garden is full of many visitors. I can see that what some people call weeds are actually healing herbs to a few others

Climbing Maslow's Mountain

This is not really a challenge to the universally accepted theory on Man's hierarchy of needs. I leave that to the psychologists.


Just wondering...Do we really need to climb and climb till we reach (if ever possible) the peak of Abraham Maslow's mountain, before knowing and actualising self? Isn't a prior knowledge of self helpful in determining its true needs?


Especially in these days of economic recession, we spend a great part of our lives focusing on just our basic needs, leaving others such as our need for safety,love, independence and self-actualisation.


And so we eat with the aim of satisfying our bodies, only to be told how we have fed ourselves with the wrong foods. We try to meet other physiological needs and end up with undesirable and often life threatening effects.


So we remain at the basic level, having not been able to meet the real needs of self, not even with all the money at our disposal.


Couldn't we just reverse the hierarchy of needs and begin with the search for self actualisation, attempting to first reach into the core of our beings and have at least a glimpse of what we truly need?


With this approach, we would know the right food, not necessarily the expensive or palatable ones, that our bodies need  and so on.




Desperate situations call for desperate solutions. This reverse journey may well be one of such... 

The Impact of the Sensational

Our gentlemen of the press know this better. That when a dog bites a man, it is no news, but when a man bites a dog, it becomes news.


In as much as we desire that events around us move normally and according to plan, it appears that this too could be boring. So we need a shake up, a strange occurrence, something that would cause us to open our eyes widely, clap our hands or shake our heads vigorously in disbelief.


What do we really want to know? The usual happenings or scandals....the rotational or the sensational? The open things or the mysterious? 


Our friends keep on asking "So, what's new?" Meaning that they are not keen on hearing what is usual.


It is very apparent that to impact our world and stand out in whatever we do, we really just have to do the unusual- the extraordinary. 


Are we starting a new business in an existing market or creating a new market or do we seek a boost in our present or prospective job? Do we have what it takes to do that unusual thing that will advertise us? That extra touch?


Worth thinking about... That investment of time, energy or other resources could be just what we need to impact our world... 

On unproductive arguments and debates

Once the ego is involved, please leave any debate or argument to just rest in peace, no matter how much info you have, and save yourself unnecessary drain of energy that should be better conserved.

Ego defence mechanisms like escapism and denial of reality are used a lot in arguments. No matter how you present it, how you fine tune it, as long as the person feels you are hurling stones at his ego, the very core of his being, his only dependable reference point in life, he blocks his senses and will neither see nor hear you; nor even want to...So, he resorts to abusive and foul language to fight back...Guess where this could lead to....So, why don't we take preventive measures?

There are a thousand and one ways to put our energy into productive use.

The little parts of a Great Change

Sitting down alone one late sunset, I peered through the window of my heart to see where I would love to be at that point in time. I could see this very vividly in my mind's eye...Then I retreated and began to analyse myself...where I actually was..


The distance...the gap in between..was quite huge and really a matter of fact, acts to be carried out and even cash to be spent...


Only the thought of the journey between, that I must traverse, almost took me to a state of despair and hopelessness...threatening to shoot up my blood pressure.....


Then I took a breath, long and deep, and then exhaled as a flush of inspiration came all over me, and I heard these soundless words coming from within me.


"The Great Change you seek is like a huge piece of machinery, which  you need to transport from one point to another. Dismantle it and take as much pieces as you can conveniently convey, little by little, rather than attempting to lift the whole object"


As I moved each piece, I found more peace in my mind..and I drew nearer to my ideal, with a huge sense of relief...

The Power of Ideas

Just compare a seed with the fully grown plant that it could give rise to; what is the ratio? Today's idea may be very small, even infinitesimal, or crude, but if we nourish it and give it positive conditions, may turn out to be gigantic and refined, with monumental effects on the society...